Humans say I love you because of two reasons.

It’s either they really do.

Or they want to make themselves believe that they do.

So D and J have been using that word to me for ages and up until now (actually, a few minutes ago because I already googled it), I don’t know what it means. Apparently, grotty is a british slang and it means nasty.

I shall use that word. That face is grotty.

I wrote you something. While waiting for you, I wrote you something. Hoping that I can make everything better with it.

I am not saying that I love you, because love is a feeling. And feelings fade. Therefore, if I say I love you, my love for you has the chance to fade too.

So I don’t love you. Let’s just say that you’re the paint and I am the home. Without you I will still be a house but not really.

There are times when I can’t wait to finish high school and to just get it over and done with but I do know that when I’m finally there, I won’t feel the same. I’d probably cry my non existent balls out and hug people albeit hugging is a very awkward action for me (I flap my arms to show that I want to hug the person but too awkward to do so). I know that when I’m finally in Year 12, I’d want everything to go back. I would want to turn back time and experience the bullshits of high school all over again.

I mean, ugh. High school is fun. The aforementioned loathing is true however, I know that deep inside me, I’m enjoying it. 

I don’t know. I have two and a half more years so I don’t know why I’m being all dramatic about high school. I think it’s because of the honey.

I want to be friends with Viets.

They seem cool.

Or at least the internet makes them seem cool.

How come I don’t see much asians around my place.

:(

I need you. 

I want you.

I need other words to let you know how much I’m longing for you. To touch you, to feel you, to be beside you.

My vocabulary is not as wide as yours and I don’t have a thousand words to express what I feel for you. 

I love you.